Diary of an otondo ep 4

Yhelloooooooo

Today is sunday on camp which meant that there was no 4am waking up for most of us. Unfortunately for me i'm part of 3 platoon which meant i had to report for duty at 4.30am. The whole 207 of us in 3 platoon were grouped into kitchen, sanitation, utitlity and maintenance. I was with the kitchen group so i had to do some washing, sweeping and in the end i was the usher of the hungry thousands of the whole camp. Directing people where they take their bread n teas and showing them the right way out.

In the end, i got my share of bread and boiled egg which was my first time getting food off the camp kitchen. I guess its alright to get something like that off them since its not some yeye food that they will cook to no taste. Its midday and i really wanna sleep but we will soon be called out again and i cnt risk being tired for the tiring exercises.

Yesterday night was short for me. Had some banging ogbona soup and pounded yam at mami before heading straight to bed cos i knew i had an early morning.

The other male block next to us were the ones that had a story to tell. Do you remember the story of a corper calling a soldier "white hawk" in one of my earlier posts? These lot had a similar encounter. A certain group stayed out late at mami markrt and ignored the call for night out. They were all called out to the parade ground, told to sit on the cold grass for about 30mins, then told to do frog jump drills. A race of 3 persons, the first goes back to the hostel while the 2nd and 3rd had to wait lying flat on the floor for a chance to compete again for an opportunity to go to back indoors.... they were also asked to roll on d floor and do some other yeye drills all because of one or two stoopid muchachos. I'm so happy this didnt happen to me cos we were a tiny bit close to recieving a similar punishment. Mo sope temi.

My room was lively today cos a "politics" arguement was going on and alot had somethn to say. From nigerian affairs to russia, usa, iran, iraq and isreal. It was quite informative listening to them talk, i heard alot of knowledge as regards history of nigeria being passed around. Kudos to the history students!

Goos day so far. Cnt wait to shit as usual.. i think its gona be a suya and fries thing at mami tonight. Ire oooo.

Diary if an otondo! Ep 3

Hi muchachos and muchachitos.

Its been a couple of days on camp and all is still going well apart from the fact that i havnt had a shit i n 4 days. I heard some terrible news about the toilet from day one that i have been here. Am getting close to my limit i might have to do something oh. My belle just bloat and i don surpress too much..

Did i mention that 90% of the population on camp are ibos or south souh and south east? and nearly half are from delta state university and auchi or whetever its called and they somehow have this chemsitry between them. Pigin english is the norm here, if you nor fit relate and u dey speak phone, oyo lo wa. The parade went well, done the horray ish with our caps, will upload a video i took in d next episode. Although a lot standing was involved, my gel heel cups came in handy as it reduced the pain of standing long hours.

The night wasnt that great. I was jejely sleeping during light out, and some of ma funny room mates where cracking jokes n laughing. A soldier came and told us all to go to bed . But an otondo didnt know it was a soldier talking. He replied. "Shut up, you white hawk" the soldier got vexed and demanded the person to come out. But ma guy didnt stand up, he told us all to come for drills after and we all just turned on the dude to come out. My guy did not even bulge. I'm using the term 'ma guy' not because i know him but just as reference. He wouldnt come out and it was either him or the whole room full of 42 different charcaters. We got lucky sha cos another soldier pleaded on our behalf. I swear if i had done some yeye drills for this dude i dnt even recognise i woulda moved out that room.

Anyways its all going good. I still never shit for 4days o. We have some dumb ass lecture now sha. Teachn us how to speak yoruba. Like i said over 90percent of this ppl here are ibo. . .we also had a lecture on ekiti tradition or yoruba tradition of using "magun". Half these muchachos did not know what it meant lol. They explained to them and invited ppl for some questions and there was loads. One of the guyz asked this; "our mission here is to be productive, so wouldnt it be better for us to reproduce? Everyone laughed at d silly question which was stoopid one way thinking.  The lecture don almost end sha, I never chop better food in days. I plan to branch mama nonso as soon as this shit done.. Safe muchachos

Diary of the otondo. Ep 2

Hi guyz..

First day in camp was filled with so much excitement!. The journey to camp was kinda tricky, got stopped by police in ibadan!. Fucking bastards just said "this vehicle is stolen" beCause we had customised plates..blah blah blah! My guy was taking me to the station and we just had to settle cos if we went to the station, they would make us do some long processes and probably detain us because they know they can. but i got there in the end and met up with some guyz i had connected with on nairaland and twitter.

The day started off with a bag search, my stapler, and all important sim cutter was siezed because they termed it dangerous. I'm kinda struggling with network as glo is kinda shit. I messed up with this one vos i could have got an airtel or mtn before coming to camp which i knew was the better option. So far we are expecting mtn and airetel to bring a full load of sims to camp so we can buy n do the stoopid process of 'registering'

So far, nothing about accomodation is imprressive.i guess this goes the same as other camps. We are in a room the size of my living room and have a flipping 21 bunkers! Thats 42 people cranked up in one little place. It was very dirty with loads of rubbish all about the place but we all contributed 20Naira for an outsider to help sweep it. Looking better at the moment but i have a feeling these muchachos i'm staying with will start dropping pure water bags n shit on d floor again.

In this small room, we have a comedian already, a warri boy who doesnt stop complaining in a funny way. Last night was fun but we had to tell him to shut up cos we had only a couple of hours to get some sleep for the 4am early call; which we all had to be on the field as soon as we heard the clarion call.

Clothing provided by nysc is nothing compared to shit. Shit might actually be better lol. The socks looks like something i cnt even describe. It was a good idea bringing extra pairs from home. The khaki looks big but i will manage it, aint nobody got time to pay N1500 to amend shit . The annoying thing about this is that there could have been a better way of sorting out issues of oversizing. These lot just give u a kit , they dnt care what size you are. You can be a size 8 and end up with a size 11. And they dont give a shit. You can ask a simple question and they will land you with a rude reply that doesnt even answer your question.

The parade training!!! Everyone is being trained with codewords on how to march n shit. We line up in platoons and our platoon leader (a soldier) gives us d training. Looking at other platoons and their captains, i think i ended up in the wrong platoon cos its filled with too much unserious people and our captain is kinda dry compared to the others. We r still far behind in the training compared to others. Our guy is just plain lazy.

Foood!! As soon as we got released! I ran straight to mami market!! Mama nonso!! Having being told by 3 different people about mama nonso, i just had to try it out. I had d jollof rice and i was dissapointed! Will try her other meals in d coming days. Food provided by nysc? Dont even go there. These lot give you one spoon of rice and one small fish, sometimes u end up with d head of a fish. I dnt think i will never step foot in there to queue for that crap. Then i wouldnt say that out loud with these people especially infront of our comedian who spent a lot of time raking about the food. You gotta be considerate about stuffs like dat cos some people are not priviledged to enjoy mami everyday.

Its 2nd day esrly morning and i have been up since 2am. Queued to get some water for bathing wich was long cos a lot people was surprisigly awake tryna get ready. Bathing will be an issue cos i saw a couple of peeps bathing outside and i thought wetin thes guyz they do? But after going into the bathroom once this morning. I think i will be copying thosr guyz bsthing outside in the dark the coming days.

Its 10minutes to 4am.  Gonna get ready to be called out for d morning shitzo.
Looking forward to meeting some new people in my platoon today.
Otondo!!! Call to attention, coooooooode 1!!!!! Lol. Ciao

Pardon any errors. All this was from my phone.

Now An Otondo For A year! Ekiti Here I Come

DIARY OF AN OTONDO!  Ep1

Writing this feels like Dejavu cos i think i dreamt about it! I think!

Been back home a couple of weeks now and have had to do a lot of foundation stuffs to make sure my comeback doesn't end up disappointing. I have registered to take part in the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) scheme. I have heard several stories about the scheme and the most interesting thing i've heard is the 3weeks orientation training where you get some light army training, get to be in platoons, get to sing some pretty cool songs, get to do something called CDS(community development service) although most people dont really enjoy doing it.

Overall, I think I am excited!! I leave 6am tomorrow to Ekiti where i've been posted. I did some research as  usual and found out a couple of cool stuffs about camp Ekiti!. One being a certain Mama Nonso restaurant which was recommended to me by 3 different people who served there lol. A certain Captain JF London mentioned a couple pf times, not so good stories of Ekiti locals putting Juju (Magun) on their females. Not that i'm looking forward to knacking locals but the shit is scary enough for anyone thinking about it lol. I've connected with a few prospective corpers on nairaland and twitter, looking forward to seeing them all at imuren camp!

Well, theres not much to write about until i get there. Everything all set and done, bagz all packed, documents all copied in abundance! Advices from past corpers all well documented and i feel i'm ready!! wish me luck oh!.