Diary of an otondo ep 6

As i am re-writing this i am soooooo pissed! Everything i am about to write again had been finished only for me to delete by mistake. I hope i remember all i wrote cos it was a spurr of the moment thingy.

Im gona start with 'I HAD A SHIT!!' lol. I wrote an application to leave camp so i had a confrontation with the camp director. She read my appication and said something like "you have spent all your money on that new girlfriend at mammy market abi, now you want to go and bring more". I just laughed and smiled but that wasn't the case. From day one, i was already short off my budget cos of d underestimation of fuel cost and the yeye police at ibadan so i was always going to need some more.

So i got the permission and left for the bank, some other dudes wanted money too so they done the risky,  giving me their atms and pin number to help them get cash. Done all the bizniz with money and asked the security if they had a toilet, he pointed towards a door, i was not expecting much but i was darn surprised!! I entered, it was 'world class' and maybe 4star or 3.5. I sat down on a clean wc comfortably for a good half an hour getting rid of all those toxins that had been pilling up inside of me. It felt like paradise, even i dont believe i can be talking about shit so refreshing like this, the toilet had tissue roles, running water and hand drier. It was blisssss, a million times beter than what this camp people call toilet! I am preety sure majority of these camps have the same issues. Only if some of these blockheads at mammy or officiald had some brains, they would build a good toilet/bathroom and employ one person who is just stationed there to maintain it and charge people for the service. Maybe 20naira or 50naira, it would be good business and corpers would actually patronise them. I know of people who havnt had a shit in 2weeks! And some plan not to have it because they might colapse in those bins they call toilet.

Anywayz on to other things. The enterpreneurship lectures!!! Some of these guyz are just plain thieves! They will copy and paste information that is freely available on the internet into a book and sell to this unsuspecting 'nigerian graduates'. They come on the mic spitting sense and nonsense( in some cases) and in a charismatic and motivational way. So some sections of the crowd will obviously buy into such a thing. The smart ones know what to expect when someone comes on the mic, it ends with them advertising thier book and wanting some ridiculous prices for some services they provide

Another thing i would like to talk about is the 'quality' of nigerian graduates we have on this camp, i find it disgusting that some of these people dont even have email addesses, how tha heck did you spend 5yrs in university and u dont have the most comon thing? some of the girls cant even put a sentence together in english. Pigin english is a norm and if u cant relate in that, dem go label you. Who do we blame for this fuckup na? The gorvernment, for the low standard of universities? The universities for not having some sort of 'personal developement' as a subject for students? Or the students for not being socially aware about what they can use the internet for?

Anywayz, on to other things, sunday is always the most enjoyable day on camp, you wake whenever the heck u want, no parade or shit like that unless u are involved interplatoon activities. This sunday was very rainy and these guyz played football in heavy rain! We are lucky in our camp that the state co-ordinator told the commandant he doesnt want any corper doing drills under the rain but with these guyz 'singing 'under the sun or in the rain' whilst playing under heavy rain, the commandant might change his mind o.

Bathing on camp!! Brings back child hood memories when i go to the village. Never seen so many grown ass men 'shadow bathe' in my life before. You know what shadow bathe is? Lol. Its an art, no one is allowed to put on a torch light, all u gotta do is strip naked and do some reflex bathing lol.

We got 8 days left in camp and i so much miss home. The whole camp thing is no different from a prison. We are in uniforms, we have strict sleep n wake up times, we cant go outside camp anytime we want, the facilities in terms of toilet n bathroom are nothing to write home about, the food is rationed to be very little (100naira per meal ration). Imagine a grown ass man or a grown ass married man with kids be getting one spoon of rice and a head of fish. The money is there, certain ppl need to stop stealing and shorting the ration of corpers so this service year can be worthwhile. . . . See ya next episode. . .i knw i missed out some stuffs but i just cant remember at the moment.